but for the Grace of God

my bread recipe

June 10, 2008 · No Comments

Whole Wheat Oatmeal Bread

Yield: 2 loaves (8.5″x4.5″ loaf pan)

2 cups Hot water

1/4 cup vegetable (canola) oil

1 1/3 cups rolled oats

1/3 cup sugar

2 Tbls Vital Wheat Gluten

2 tsp. Dough Enhancer

2 tsp Sea Salt

5-6 cups Freshly Milled Hard Wheat Flour

4 tsp SAF Instant Yeast

1. Measure ingredients into bowl, liquids first, then dry ingredients, but use only half the flour and add the yeast last, on top of flour.

2. Mix gently until the flour is moistened. Continue mixing, adding flour until the dough cleans the sides and bottom of the bowl.

3. Knead according machine.

4. Optional Rise of 15 minutes or more, or skip this step.

5. Dive dough into two portions.

6. Deflate the dough by slamming on counter or rolling out.

7. Shape into loaves and place in greased pans.

8. Rise uncovered about 25-30 minutes, until doubled or 1″ over pan.

9. Bake at 350 for 30 minutes, or until bread is 190 with meat thermometer. (I have a digital probe that plugs into my oven, so I can check my temp easily as it bakes.)

10.   Remove from pan.  Cool fifteen minutes before slicing.

I got this recipe from Lori Viets book, No More Bricks, Successful Whole Grain Bread. I am very pleased with my bread. Often, I don’t even use a full five cups of flour.   I highly recommend this book.  It is full of information about grains, baking procedures, recipes, etc, but easy to understand.  Plus, I met the gal at the homeschool conference and she was great in person as well.  She emails answers to my questions and shipped my order out immediately.  It came the next day! How’s that for customer service?

Let me know if you make this bread.  I really like adding the oats, so this is the reciped I use most often.

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my pregnant life

June 6, 2008 · 2 Comments

I’ve just set my bread out to rise, so I’ve go 30 minutes to fill ya in on the happenings of my pregnant life.

All is well, but I gotta tell ya, having a fourth baby at 33 is taking its toll.  Nothing serious going on, but at nearly 22 weeks pregnant, I’m already feeling all those aches and pains that don’t show up until the third trimester.  I’ve been having calf cramps in the early, early morning. OUCH! I wake up several times a night already in back and hip pain, which makes me groggy when those other little ones are up at 6 am. I’ve got that pelvic discomfort (enough said).  And to top it off, I’m measuring 1 1/2 weeks ahead of schedule (at my ultrasound, baby was measuring in the 86th percentile. My experience with Jesse was that the ultrasound completely underestimated how big he was).  But here’s the good news– my blood pressure is great, I’m still exercising, and my weight gain has been slow and steady.

Instead of walking I’ve been using the Fit Mama DVD.  I LOVE it! (Thanks Bryn!) It starts with 22 minutes of salsa dancing, 20 minutes of yoga, and 15 minutes of stretching and kegels. It is very revitalizing and hip! Plus, I get to stand under my ceiling fan in the a.c., instead of sweating it out in that humid, humid heat.  We put up our pool this weekend, so I hope to include some water exercise as well.  That water is very, very chilly right now, but also very refreshing.

Here’s my biggest news–I switched from my family practitioner to a nurse midwife. After discussing  with my doctor my desire for an unmedicated birth, I felt she wasn’t as supportive as I would have liked.  So, remembering that I’m the consumer here (thanks, Jill!) I started shopping around until I found what I wanted! After several phone calls and some research, I’ve ended up at the For Women Only practice near Overland Park Regional. They have two nurse midwives and two obs.  Plus, they have an office in my home town!!! So now I only drive 2 miles for my monthly checkups.  I am so thrilled.  I met the midwife who will probably deliver me (Lindsay) and she was great.  AND young!  I’m talking young, young . . . like late 20s.  But she’s delivered babies for several years and has birthed her own, so I felt confident with her. She was not nearly as concerned with my having a supersized baby or gaining more than 20 pounds.  I am feeling quite confidant now with my medical care.

Well that’s about it and I hear my timer calling me to check my bread! More later on other stuff!

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Bread, bread and more bread

May 22, 2008 · 5 Comments

About month ago I started making my own breads from freshly ground whole wheat flour. Oh my . . . it is simply heavenly and incredibly nutritious. I’ve learned so much in this endeavor and thought I’d share some of what I’ve learned with you. I want my wheat bread to be as delicious as the $5 loaf I was buying at the Great Harvest store.

*All wheat flour is not created equal. The whole wheat flour sitting on the grocery self next to the white flour is really not much better for you than that highly processed, bleached white flour. Most of the nutrients have been removed from it so it will not go bad. Freshly ground wheat flour is only good for a few days and must be stored in the refrigerator. It will last up to two months in the freezer. I’ve been grinding mine at Hy-Vee for $.79/lb. Also, it is full of fiber . . .

*All bread machines are not created equal. In fact, using your kitchen aid mixer with the dough hook is a better alternative than a bread machine. I can make two loaves at once with my kitchen aid. I used to always use my bread machine, but then I couldn’t vary flour amounts. Now, I’m becoming comfortable putting flour in the dough until the dough is right, depending on humidity, type of whole wheat grain used, sweetener, or temperature.

*Use your hottest tap water when preparing the ingredients. I use instant yeast (bread machine yeast), so you put the water in the mixer first, then the dry ingredients, then the yeast. When using hot tap water, the flour and bowl absorb most of the heat, leaving the right temperature for your yeast. Do not use water hotter than 120 degrees. (120 degrees is the setting most experts agree is best for energy conservation and safety)

*Don’t over knead. This is practically impossible to do by hand . . . but easily done with a powerful mixer. Mine takes about 4-6 minutes to knead two loaves. I learned the “window test” to check the dough. Pull a golf ball size of dough out. If you can work that dough to have a small transparent window (imagine when you blew bubble gum as a kid), then your dough is ready.

*Use vital wheat gluten and dough stabilizer. Considering you only add a tablespoon and teaspoon respectively, these two ingredients soften your whole wheat and give it a longer shelf life. My bread last about three days if I don’t freeze it.

*Roll out your dough with oil, not flour. Any flour that comes into contact with the dough has not been kneaded and will only toughen your bread.

Tuesday has turned into my baking day. This week I made two loaves of bread (one was parmesan garlic) and two batches of cinnamon craisin-nut rolls. Those rolls are so, so, so good. And don’t worry about overeating . . . remember all that fiber? I can hardly eat one roll before I feel stuffed. I think that is one of the reasons why I am having a slower weight gain this pregnancy, I’m eating yummy, unproccessed, filling foods. For an afternoon snack I often have a slice of bread with natural peanut butter or home-mixed orange butter (the butter is not home churned, I’m just adding olive oil, orange juice and fresh orange zest to salted butter).

Another way we’ve incorporated the grains is through pancakes. I found a wonderful recipe for Grain and Nut Whole Wheat Pancakes. These pancakes were wonderful. Remember that I cook for 7, so I doubled the recipe. Not necessary. One batch would feed 4-6 easily if you are serving eggs and fruit with it. Next time I make this recipe I’m going to try adding a bit of cinnamon and vanilla. We are cinnamon and vanilla addicts in this house, adding them to basically everything!

Now that I’m proving myself to all in the house, I’ve got my eye on the Bosch mixer.  This mega mixer can knead 6 loaves at once.  It is pretty pricey, though, so I’ll be waiting for a while.   Then, I’ll be wanting my own grain mill.  So after I spend all that money, I’ll be able to make yummy, nutritious whole wheat breads for under a dollar a loaf. Hmm . . . wonder how long it will take me to recoup the difference?

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The ultrasound results are:

May 19, 2008 · 5 Comments

It’s a BOY!It’s a BOY!It’s a BOY!It’s a BOY!It’s a BOY!It’s a BOY!It’s a BOY!It’s a BOY!

It’s a BOY!It’s a BOY!It’s a BOY!It’s a BOY!It’s a BOY!It’s a BOY!It’s a BOY!It’s a BOY!

It’s a BOY!It’s a BOY!It’s a BOY!It’s a BOY!It’s a BOY!It’s a BOY!It’s a BOY!It’s a BOY!

It’s a BOY!It’s a BOY!It’s a BOY!It’s a BOY!It’s a BOY!It’s a BOY!It’s a BOY!It’s a BOY!

It’s a BOY!It’s a BOY!It’s a BOY!It’s a BOY!It’s a BOY!It’s a BOY!It’s a BOY!It’s a BOY!

It’s a BOY!It’s a BOY!It’s a BOY!It’s a BOY!It’s a BOY!It’s a BOY!It’s a BOY!It’s a BOY!

It’s a BOY!It’s a BOY!It’s a BOY!It’s a BOY!It’s a BOY!It’s a BOY!It’s a BOY!It’s a BOY!

It’s a BOY!It’s a BOY!It’s a BOY!It’s a BOY!It’s a BOY!It’s a BOY!It’s a BOY!It’s a BOY!

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I just found

May 9, 2008 · 2 Comments

macaroni and cheese in the bathroom sink.  Hmm.  I’m thinking the culprit is a devious three year old who was told he couldn’t have anything else until he finished is macaroni.  By the way, the macaroni was left over from the dinner last night.  He normally devours the stuff, but this time I dressed it up with chicken, black beans and queso.  He was determined not to eat the beans . . . I am determined he will eat them.  I’ve really upped our bean consumption in an effort to eat a bit more protein, save some $$, and save the planet (that last is in response to all the newspaper articles encouraging us to eat meatless meals once a week).  Anyway, I’ve been hiding them in salads, quesadillas, other veggie sides, or rice.

Speaking of beans and rice, anybody have a good beans and rice recipe?  I’ve got a couple I’ve printed off the internet, but I’m open to all sorts of ways to add beans to our diet!

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too many mochas?

May 7, 2008 · 1 Comment

Yesterday as I drove past the Starbucks where I make my Sunday morning prechurch ritual of a nonfat decaf grande mocha with whip, I hear from the three year old Jesse, “You not gonna get a mocha today Mommy?”

I limit myself to once a week, but the boy still knows my habits . . . reminds me of Jenny’s post about the same thing. Our kids know us so much better than we given them credit for, don’t they?

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What . . . no epidural?

May 4, 2008 · 6 Comments

Gals you were great with all the encouraging comments from my last post.  Thanks so much!

Alright, since I am so obsessed with all things naturally-birth related, I wanted to expound a bit on why I am considering/planning a drug-free birth.  First a little personal history.   During my first labor, I took a dose of demerol. HUGE MISTAKE.   It didn’t help a bit with the pain, stopped my contractions, and made me loopy.  This led to pitocin, which led to super-strong contractions, which led to me yelling at JD in my demorol-induced crankiness to find a nurse and get me an epidural.  That’s about all I remember actually . . . sad, isn’t it?  For Jonah and Jesse’s labor, I refused any IV drugs and opted for just an epidural.  When I received the epidurals, it wasn’t really for the pain at the time, as much as fear for what was to come.  With that being said, here’s some of the reasons for why I want to go epidural-free.

  • God made my body to birth babies.   It is natural.  Women have been surviving this for thousands of years and I’m pretty sure I could survive it too.
  • Every friend I’ve spoken who chose to go epidural-free has not regretted it. I spent last night talking with Martha, who’s had three natural births.  Yes, we discussed the pain, but we also discussed how to focus through it, how to learn what works for me to get through the toughest contractions.  As my time draws closer, I want to spend more time talking with those who have chosen this route so I can be as prepared as possible.
  • I can get up much, much sooner. I hate waiting for sensation to come back and having to have help moving my dead legs around.
  • I don’t want a catheter.  After each birth, I ended up with a urinary track infection.  EACH TIME.  With Jonah, I didn’t catch it earlier enough and it developed into a kidney infection.  Yeah, that’s real fun to deal with when you are postpartum.  (I’ve never had a UTI any other time, just after labor)
  • It is cheaper.  I’m cheap.   (BTW, did you know how much money the hospital makes off of each epidural? A lot.  That’s part of the biggest money maker of the birthing process . . . no wonder the nurses are so quick to offer it.)
  • I’m planning on having a doula! I’m very excited about this! I really appreciated what Faith had to say in the comments of my last post about having the support of a doula and/or midwife.  (I did look into having a midwife, but JD just wasn’t comfortable with that, plus it appears that most midwifes in KS do homebirths.  I am definitely not ready for that. The hospital I’ll be delivering at does have nurse midwives though.  I need to call and see exactly what that means . . . )
  • Several of those I’ve talked with or read about have described the birthing process as empowering, incredibly high, etc. Frankly I’m wondering if I’m missing something.  By my nature, I’m not super-emotional.  I tend to be pretty even-tempered, so I don’t know if I’ll experience that emotional high, but what if?
  • I have easy births.  So far, my babies have quickly descended into the birth control and entered the world with little or no pushing.  To be honest, if I had to push for hours like some of you, I don’t know if I would be quite so eager to attempt this.

I’m sure there are more reasons that I am not thinking of at this moment.  And just so you don’t think I’m completely one-sided on this, I do have concerns.  Most concerns deal with after the baby is born though.  And in case you are worrying about me becoming an elitist about this, don’t worry a bit.  This is a personal choice for me that after three other births, talking with others, and reading a LOT of info, that I want to experience.

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a pregnancy update

April 28, 2008 · 11 Comments

As I enter my 16th week I’m rejoicing that I have only gained about 4 lbs! Even better is that my official doctor’s files record me as only gaining ONE POUND! (Chalk up the difference to wearing shorts with flip flops last week to my monthly check-in.)  Friends, this is record breaking for me so please cheer me on.   When pregnant with my giant sized Jesse, I gained 50 lbs+ and had a 10 lb 6 oz  baby.  And no . . . I didn’t have gestational diabetes.  So in an effort to prevent growing another giant, my doctor is strongly urging me to gain no more than 20 lbs.  She would really like me to stay at 15 lbs total, but that even seems a bit unrealistic to me!  So what are your suggestions? I’m trying to stay active by walking on the treadmill or outdoors.  I’m eating healthy.  I’m trying not to eat too much of those yummy, yummy sweets.  We’ve already replace those burger joints with Subway or Goodcents.   I need to stay motivated.  After eating two too many really scrumptious brownies yesterday, I only allowed my self the tiniest sliver of brownie today.  Oh and, I started writing down everything I eat and its approximate caloric value.   The hardest thing is since I am trying to watch this so closely, I feel so guilty when I actually gain a pound!!!!!

Last Thursday I finally heard the babie’s heartbeat.  Whew, no twins hiding in my uterus.  Hearing that beautiful, fast heartbeat is one of my favorite parts of being pregnancy.  Nothing, nothing, nothing else brings it home to me that a little, tiny baby is growing inside me like hearing the heartbeat. This little critter’s heartbeat was a fast 160 . . . isn’t that folklore for a  girl????

About the girl issue, yes, we would love a girl.  The boys want a sister.  I want a daughter.  But I refuse to focus on that because I know I would love any child that God granted us with.  I am still surprised that the number of people who ask if we are trying for a girl.  UGH.   We’ll just take a baby please.  Either sex will still add a new personality to the mix, someone with his/her own quirks.   So again, yes we’d love a girl, but I’d never be disappointed in receiving a boy.

My uterus is right on track in its size.  That was a surprise to me since I always measure so big with Jesse and since I am showing so much.  I looked at the first-time pregnant mom across the aisle from me during church with a tinge of jealousy.  She is 4 weeks ahead and barely has any baby bump at all! It is not so much that my belly is big, as just  stretched out I guess!  I am already feeling all those ligaments stretching and pulling.  I am already uncomfortable with certain postions. I am also already feeling the baby move!

Finally, I am considering attempting this birth naturally, with no epidural.  I’ve been doing some reading on this, and the more I read, the more I want to do it.  Any advice or suggestions on this would be highly valued!

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American Sign Language

April 14, 2008 · 3 Comments

Last fall, a remarkable thing happened in our church. We welcomed a deaf congregation into ours. Now this may now seem too remarkable, but if you know much about deaf culture, then you know that often the deaf remain isolated. When our pastor shared with us about joining with this congregation, he stressed over and over that their members were to be our members. He wanted real relationships, not a “deaf ministry”. So here we are six months later and I’m taking an American Sign Language class.

I am so excited about this! All I’ve ever really known before is finger-spelling and a few signs we used with the boys regarding mealtime, please /thank you, etc. Now I get to learn it all. It is overwhelming! In case you know little about ASL, it is not just signing what you are speaking. It is learning a whole new visual language with new grammar, syntax, cultural norms, etc. Things that are rude in our speaking culture are normative in a deaf culture. For example, it is acceptable to “eaves drop” on a signed conversation. If those involved in the signed conversation want privacy, they will sign with small hand movements or seek a private area. Also, signing involves a great deal of facial expressions.

Several of the families who have started attending our church have small children. I have smiled and nodded, mouthed “hello” in the nursery hall, but as of yet, I’ve not really extended myself to communicate with them. Tonight I learned to get over my foolish pride of looking stupid or making them uncomfortable. These women are patient and kind, ready to make new friends, too.

I’ve seven more weeks of this first ASL class. Then, hopefully I can advance on to the other advanced classes. Oh, one more thing. JD is actually taking this class with me! Missie is keeping the boys for us so we can learn together.

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about dogs

April 8, 2008 · 4 Comments

Yesterday we said goodbye to a family friend, our dog Byron.  Our beloved sheltie was only 11, but he had struggled for many years with skin and ear infections.  Each year as the humidity rose in the spring, Byron developed fungal infections and then ear infections.  We constantly battled this with baths, medicines, shaving his beautiful coat.  All that took its tole on his body, as he lost his hearing, his coat didn’t grow back thickly, and he lost his personality. He spent his days sleeping. Only sleeping. Never playing, never cuddling. He was miserable. So we made the decision and let our pet go.

The task fell to me to take him to the vet. As I said goodbye and kissed his nose, I couldn’t hold back the tears. Our kind old vet gently said, “It is always hard, even when doing the right thing.” And then he took Byron back.  As I signed the papers, I almost changed my mind.  So I left, crying, as quickly as possible.

It was the hardest thing I’ve ever done.

************************

Every Sunday JD and I rush out of the house by 8:20 so that we have time to make it to Starbucks for my weekly mocha and JD’s hot tea.  As we get back on the highway to head towards church we drive past a small lake. It’s there that every Sunday morning at 8:45 that I see them, the lady and her golden retriever.  Each week through the fall and cold, wet winter, I saw them. She’s always bundled up in her teal coat and hood, leash coiled in one hand, poop bag in the other.  The dog looks just like our Sam.  Big, strong and beautiful.  The dog is usually off-leash, fetching a tennis ball or stick, or running in the brush.

I look for them now. I look even during other days of the week. I wonder what the dog’s name is, how old, boy/girl.  I wonder if they are out each day or if Sundays are their special play time.  Does the woman have a family? Is this dog her one companion?  Do they know that others are spying on their time?

One thing I do know, I spend more time with Sam because of what I see each Sunday morning, mocha in hand, on my way to church.

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